Bedtime Battles

It used to be simple to get Kieran to go to bed. Sure some nights he would delay and others he'd be downright stubborn (no idea where that came from), but generally he'd follow orders and do what needed done.

Last night, however, he lost it. First mistake, letting him play on my Fire while I finished up with dinner dishes, etc. When I told him it was time to go upstairs, he did nothing. I asked if he heard me and he said he had. So I took the Fire from him and shut it off. He seemed OK with that (though not happy).

We got to his room, I told him to get naked and get ready for a bath (he had helped me scrub the tub so he could have one), he said he wanted to put his laundry away first. Knowing this for the delay tactic it was, I said we could do it after his bath but not before. He sat down and refused to do anything. I had to threaten to take away his toys to keep him from playing with anything. Finally I told him if he did not get moving in the next minute he would have a shower. Again, nothing.

Frustrated and at my wits' end, I treated him like a baby. Took his clothes off and bodily carried him upstairs to the bathroom. He is thinking this is funny, I can tell. I turn on the faucet and then the shower. He looses it. I put him into the shower and he yells "I'm not going to get clean!" I let him sob (and I mean SOB) for awhile.

Then I hear a "Mommy!" Not a cry, but a demand. He wants to tell me he's not going to get clean. I told him I'd give him a minute to reconsider and then I would do it for him. Time goes by, he does nothing, so I clean him up. He fights me every step of the way. Finally, shower is off, he's out and his nose is running. I get him some toilet paper to blow his nose, which he does and then throws the toilet paper on the ground.

I lost it. I told him in no uncertain terms he would have to pick it up. He fought me for 2 minutes before I grabbed his hand, put the tissue in it and bodily carried them both to the trash can (thank goodness he's still under 40 lbs), where I had him put the tissue away.

I took him to his room, where he still fought me on getting ready for bed. He was crying after his shower, which woke up his sister, who started crying. Ken was at his wits' end with her (she didn't want to go to sleep), so we traded.

Ken got Kieran to bed and I got Amelia back to sleep. For some reason, every time I put Kieran to bed, he fights me. Its frustrating because we don't spend as much time together and I don't like to fight with him, but he's got to know his behavior is not acceptable.

This morning, without prompting from anyone, he said to me "Mom, I'm sorry about last night." I thanked him and left it alone.

Maybe if I push his bedtime back by 1/2 hour it will be better. Maybe I'll just tell him he can put himself to bed from now on.